It's Christmas Eve, and with the measures decreed by the government, big family meals are only a 2019 dream. A difficult time for everyone. But in the face of adversity, a new love is emerging.
So we present to you a few people who “put their heart into the barbecue”.
An open-hearted Santa Claus
Frightened, Hanadi Saad, dressed up as Santa Claus, dances to the rhythm of disco music while greeting the seniors, posted on their balcony of a building in Brossard. She says she is worried about the second lockdown, scheduled from December 25 to January 11. The harsh winter and its lack of light will, she believes, lead to an increase in depressions and illnesses linked to a weak immune system. Her organization, Justice Femme, has therefore prepared a resource guide for seniors.
It includes a list of counselling centres and suicide prevention organizations, grocery delivery businesses, and tips for overcoming depression. At the beginning of December, she convinced two caterers and a pastry chef to prepare around thirty Christmas meals.
On December 24 and 25, she delivers these foodstuffs to families in need, to single or elderly people and to single-parent mothers who live in her neighborhood. Behind her glasses, she has difficulty holding back her tears as she thinks of the loneliness of these residents, which is amplified this year with feelings of fear, anxiety and distress.
Originally from Lebanon, Hanadi studied in Quebec before founding the organization Justice Femme, shortly after the Parti Québécois tried to legislate to ban religious symbols in 2013. Since the start of the pandemic, the young woman in her forties has been trying to take concrete actions that alleviate the anxiety she feels about seniors who die from COVID-19 in our hospitals, CHSLDs and residences. “Why are they sacrificed like that? asks the person whose name is among the 25 most influential women in Canada. The pandemic has brought painful memories back to her.
For 17 years, she lived in a country torn apart by civil war. During the attacks carried out by Israel, she used to hide in underground tunnels to protect herself from bombs. “We went from one region to another, as if we were refugees in our own country. I remember women running in the morning wearing pajamas full of blood,” she said.
Twenty-eight years later, the image of thousands of seniors dying in Quebec, from loneliness, malnutrition or thirst, haunts her. “I feel like I am living in a war. It's coming for me. My childhood was stolen from me, but I started my adult life here, in peace and well-being.”
After more than an hour in the cold, Hanadi continues her story. On Mother's Day, with a handful of volunteers and a disc jockey, she made the seniors dance on the balconies of residences in disadvantaged neighborhoods of Montreal and Laval. “I cried so much when I learned that a lady who could no longer be locked up threw herself down the fifth floor of a residence in East Montreal,” she confided while wiping a tear. Nearly 75% of seniors have been left alone since the start of the pandemic. At the height of the crisis, some no longer had visits from nurses or social workers.
The member organizations of the Reunification of Suicide Prevention Centers of Quebec (RCPSQ) have received an average of 20% more calls since the start of the pandemic. But it is difficult to know if the calls come from as many older people as from younger people, says the director of the Reunification, Linda Poirier.
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Mutual aid between neighbours
A few streets away from Hanadi's home in Brossard, neighbours also help each other out. Micheline, a 66-year-old retiree, decided to volunteer her time. So she took a two-meter stick to help her neighbor, who lives completely isolated. Every day, they walk together. “My neighbor lost her sight at 23 and she is now 57.
Thanks to her, I learned resilience. I admire her strength of character and, above all, she does not let difficulties get her down,” says Micheline.
The lady and her husband also help 75-year-old neighbours carry their grocery bags and pick up their mail at their post office boxes. Small gestures that make me happy. “I feel a lot of gratitude, and we are especially proud to serve people who need it,” she says with a smile.
“Take care of your seniors”
Does Hanadi Saad feel like she is changing things? “Yes, maybe,” she replies. If everyone did a small gesture, we would live in the best of all worlds. Do you know what's missing? It's love. We live in a very individualistic and selfish world.” Bringing meals to seniors and families in need, or dancing for them outside in the freezing cold, Hanadi Saad feels energized and empowered. “I want to change the world,” she concludes with a convinced tone. “I want to change the world.”
You can participate in change, but also cause it. You can influence her... that's leadership.” She wants to age at home, like her 93-year-old grandmother, who benefits from the services of the CLSC and the help of her loved ones. “Take care of your seniors, because there are 1,001 ways to give them love, and not only in person,” she exclaims.
“Remain Pépé” to encourage young people
But while Hanadi Saad wants to help seniors, there are also seniors who help young people. On the TikTok platform, The account Reste Pépé, by three elders named Gab, JR and Dan, was created “to encourage young people.” And it is very successful! Through choreography — sometimes on rigodon, sometimes on hip hop — and the latest trends on the platform, which is mainly used by young people, Reste Pépé encourages young people to get tested and to respect physical distance, but also brings a wind of love to young people who have lost a grandparent this year.
“I lost my grandmother this year, the first Christmas without her, thank you for being there for me and for making me smile again,” comments a young user. “This year, we lost our two grandmothers to COVID, my eyes are full of water to see you! Thanks for being there,” says another user.
Advice for isolated seniors (taken from the Women's Justice resource guide)
Go outside and be exposed to natural light. In a situation of anxiety, we practice various breathing exercises, but above all, we repeat aloud: “Everything is going to be fine”, and we think of all the people who love us. Listen to music, sing, take a hot bath. You also express your emotions to a friend or family.
“By relieving the tensions that weigh heavily on your heart, you will feel much better,” we are informed.
The Women's Justice resource guide is available upon request to organizations, residences and individuals aged 55 and over.
Justice Femme can be reached by writing to justicefemmeJF@gmail.com or by calling 438 476-1340