Lorena: from mother to educator — supporting children with special needs

This new portrait of educators and caregivers in Quebec tells the story of Lorena, an immigrant woman who is the mother of three children diagnosed with an autism spectrum disorder. She reoriented her career to care for children with special needs, an area where there is a severe lack of support in the province.

If you don't know Lorena and you see her on the street or on a bus, you'll probably guess that she takes care of children. She has a very particular way of making this known: she wears a pink hoodie that reads “Each child is unique,” with a heart in the middle.

“It's a sentence I saw on my son's classroom wall and I love it. I use it on various shirts and sweaters because I am a spokesperson for inclusion. I also use it in the corner of my classroom, where I put the activities my students do,” she says, smiling with joy and energy that can be heard in her voice.

Lorena Morales is a daycare educator. She welcomes students with various types of learning disabilities into her classroom, including autism spectrum disorders (ASD). According to data reported by the Toddler observatory (OTP) in 2022, the lack of human resources led to a 20 per cent reduction in the time spent attending children with special needs in daycares.

Working in such a sensitive field makes a big difference, she says. “I ask a lot of questions [to parents] because I know that maintaining a good relationship with the family is essential.” She knows this very well, as a mother of three children diagnosed with ASD and who has had to learn how to get familiar with the professionals who care for them. As a result, she learned the importance of empathy in her profession.

In Venezuela, her home country, Lorena and her husband, Arturo, had good jobs and were progressing in their careers. In 2015, a job offer made to Arturo led them to leave for London as expatriates. In 2017, Arturo was offered a new position in Montreal. The couple then had three children: Adrián, born in Venezuela, and the twins Matias and Isabel, born in England.

In Canada, things are looking good. Lorena and her family moved to Brossard in 2018. Language is a challenge for them, but they love the life they created there. And then, one day, Lorena got a call from the daycare that changed their lives.

One news, three revelations

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“They always told me that Matías was different, but I never thought there was anything to worry about. Until they called me and told me about actions I saw him doing all the time: opening and closing drawers, fixing the wheels, knocking on the glass. They asked me if I was worried about anything and pointed out, very kindly, that the things he was doing were not “normal” for his age,” says Lorena.

“At first I thought the educator was wrong, but I started to observe Matías and inquire. And I understood that something was going on.” She then went to her local health clinic (CLSC), which, after 10 months of evaluations, forms and countless questions, gave her an official diagnosis: Matías is autistic. “Some parents wait three years, sometimes longer, to get this confirmation”, explains Lorena. She then had her eldest son Adrián and Matías's twin, Isabel, evaluated.

For Adrián, the result is the same as for her brother. “I was not surprised by the diagnosis, because I was already prepared for it.” On the other hand, for Isabel, who also has ASD, her reaction is different. “I had a harder time accepting this diagnosis,” she recalls.

After the shock, everything becomes much clearer: “I decided to get on this bus with everything I had and in my own way! ” That's how Lorena's big adventure began.

A life mission

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The mother then decided to follow a teacher training course, an environment that had always attracted her. The diagnosis of her children made her want to learn everything she can to help them have a better life. “When I saw special education in the subject list, I said to myself, 'With everything I've learned here, I'm going to get all the points!'” She took an accelerated course and, in the space of a year and a half, obtained a diploma in early childhood education.

For her internship, she immediately thought of the daycare where her children went, she explains. “Because I am immensely grateful to them.”

In 2023, Lorena was recruited by this establishment. She is still working there and pursuing what she considers to be her life mission: “I have dedicated myself to welcoming all these children that most other institutions reject.”

First as a mother of autistic children and then as a caretaker, Lorena realized that “there is a huge lack of support for families with an ASD diagnosis.”

She also opens up to tell her story, which makes other mothers feel less alone. Like the one who asked her if her family knew about the diagnosis of her three children, because she did not dare to make her son's diagnosis public. “He was a child who, at first, did not want to know anything about daycare. Once he started being around me, he completely changed. He became happy doing his activities.”

Acceptance of the family is of great importance, emphasizes Lorena. “Childhood passes quickly, and it is crucial to intervene early, when the diagnosis has just been made.” A diagnosis that, according to her, “always stigmatizes the child,” even in a society where it will be more accepted than in Venezuela, where the integration of a neurodivergent child into the regular school system is still very difficult today. "When [children who have been diagnosed] do something outside of what is considered 'normal,' people notice it much more.”

Lorena found support, but she mentions her “luck” several times. According to her, unfortunately, few parents find as many resources as she does. “There are mothers who never rest, who don't have the capacity to do anything other than take care of their children.”

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Unexpected happiness

What does she think of her current job? She answered without hesitation: “I never thought I would be so happy. I became what I wanted to be. I love welcoming kids who need more attention into my group. They are not a headache for me, they come to fill my heart.” Many of her colleagues are also immigrants, and she wants to recognize their commitment and dedication to the work they do.

She believes that when a parent's child is diagnosed with autism, the parent should give themselves space. Her recommendation is: “Cry. Live it. Acceptance will come, but don't rush it. It's a loss and you have to live it.”

For those who don't yet have a clear diagnosis but are in doubt, she advises the following: “Observe your children closely, because that suspicion will lead you to see things you haven't seen before.” Behind the label “ill-mannered” may be a more complex reality, she explains. And this reality can only be revealed after professional analysis.

After six years of changes, Lorena and her family are going to apply for permanent residence in Canada.

She wants to continue to pursue specialized studies in the education of children with special needs, such as autism, Down syndrome or cerebral palsy, for example. “I want to devote myself to helping Spanish-speaking mothers. I know that receiving care in your native language makes a difference. As a mother who has been through all this, I could say to them, “You will see that everything will be better.” I think that's where we can make a big difference,” she concludes.